Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Motoring Italian Style

So, my little training session at the Segway shop in Florence, Italy seemed to be going well. Until I tried to turn a corner in the lobby. Apparently, I attempted a wide turn when I should have taken a tight one, and I began spinning in circles. The harder I tried to stop, the quicker I spinned.

As the shop clerk shouted orders, the Segway bounced off walls. I tried jumping off, but hopping off this strange small motor vehicle--which was in gear, whirling uncontrollably, and slamming into walls--wasn't an option. Dizzy and disoriented, I crashed one last time into the wall and finally fell off, backwards. The clerk came to my rescue, perhaps a moment too late, and brought the Segway to a stop.

My mother ran out of the shop's bathroom, yelling, "What happened? What was that crash I heard?" But as the three of us glanced down, little explanation was necessary. The baseboards I knocked off two of the shop's walls--and which now lay broken on the floor--seemed to tell the story just fine.

Shop destruction and all, the clerk still signed off on my rental, and I headed out to the busy streets of Florence. Probably not a wise decision by either of us.

But I figured I'd already set the Segway-riding bar exceedingly low, so what did I have to lose? Per che' non?

Are you more Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday or Kevin James in Mall Cop?


  1. At least you weren't riding it in Venice. I bet under water Segway recovery costs a ton of Euros.

  2. Bluz: Why did I not see this until now? Maybe because I'm still traumatized by my little excursion? Yeah, didn't see any Segways in Venice. Maybe it was all that water--or all those bridges. If it couldn't handle a flat lobby, God only knows I would have killed myself on the steps...