Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Scared to Live, Scared to Die

This post is outside my usual 52/52 Project material. And, I generally don't post sad stuff, preferring to go for the laugh or the simply thought-provoking. But in looking through some old high school mementos tonight, I came across this poem written by an old classmate, back in the late seventies. I encouraged him to let me publish it in our school newspaper, but I never read into it what I truly should have. Several weeks later, he committed suicide.

It punched me in the stomach when I discovered it tonight. I so wish teens back then would have been trained to look for suicidal signs from their friends.

"I'm scared to live
I'm scared to die
I just survive
By staying high.
Reality is what
I must face
To stay a part
Of this human race.
My mind is gone
but not my heart
For to live
Is where I must start.
I am dead
My feelings shot
But I thank God
For what I've got.
I have my friends
A family too,
They all wonder
What to do.
They do not know
What my problem could be
They're not blind
But they still can't see.

My only problem is me."

I'm so sorry, Ted, that we didn't truly know you and didn't understand.

Reach out, people, to those who might need you.

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